102 thoughts from Masters week

TOP DAWG TAVERN, A COUPLE OF 5-WOODS AWAY FROM AUGUSTA NATIONAL GOLF CLUB — I’ve an approachable face. 

[Insert your comment here.]

But I do. Or extra particularly, others suppose I do. I’ve usually been requested for instructions. Help. 

Whether we’ve seen the final of Tiger Woods. 

Yeah. Monday morning, whereas looking for orange juice in an effort to combine a vitamin among the many pimento cheese and peach ice cream sandwiches pushing my stomach outward, a person in perhaps his late 50s approaches at a CVS close by Augusta National. He covers his mouth and whispers, although there’s nobody else round. 

“Is … is … Tiger done?”

Hmm. I’m pondering of a measured response, as a result of I can’t waste the new taeks. They have to go right here. But I’m saved. 

Before I reply, he walks to the check-out. And I’ve reflection No. 1 from the week that was. It’s perhaps not all that shocking. But it’s a part of the attraction of all that’s the Masters and Augusta National and Augusta, G.A. 

The golf is that this metropolis’s workforce. Its Packers. Its Yankees. Its Lakers. It’s the dialog on the greasy spoon. At the water cooler and watering gap

At the CVS with somebody who appears to be like good sufficient to speak to about such issues. 

With that, listed here are a number of extra thoughts. There’ll be bits on the golf. And gadgets that orbit the golf. We’ve executed this earlier than on this house, and at this place, the Top Dawg Tavern on Washington Road, a pleasant joint with a giant menu and ’70s, ’80s and ’90s rock pumping. 

Let’s shoot for 102. We did 101 final yr. But we’re higher than then. 

Maybe. 

2. Tiger is completed! If you ask him. 

He completed final amongst those that made the lower. Shot weekend rounds of 82 (his worst-ever on the Masters) and 77. That’s ‘ceremonial golfer’ territory. Of which he stated he’d by no means reside. 

3. Tiger isn’t executed. If you watched him Friday. 

Under one of the crucial brutal of Augusta days, Woods shot even-par 72. Only eight golfers had been higher. He made the lower, for the report twenty fourth time. 

4. We’ll see him on the PGA at Valhalla, the place he gained in 2000. Can he contend this go-around? Let’s reply that with one other query:

Can you see him taking part in nicely throughout 4 days? Or will he play nicely over only one or two, like this previous week?

5. Let’s speak the subsequent Tiger. 

Ludvig Aberg! Joking, mildly. He represented himself outstandingly nicely in main look No. 1, ending second, and majors, plural, are in his future. I wrote about my stroll with him on Sunday right here. 

6. Son Charlie out with the alignment sticks with Dad Tiger on Sunday on the vary was enjoyable. That’s one helluva dialog. “Hey, can you come to Augusta on Sunday during the Masters to help your 15-time major-winning dad with his hip turn.”

My dad requested me to chop the grass. 

7. Then there’s Tiger Goods. Sorry, I attempted. But it kinda works for Scottie Scheffler, the murderer disguised as a pleasant man. 

But that’s been a factor with the SS Shotmaker — people need some sizzling sauce to go together with their meal. Folks name him boring. Folks name him vanilla. Maybe so. But have a look at Sunday. The leaderboard collapsed beneath his weight. He performed his best-in-the-world sport. He made others come get him. And they hit balls within the water and within the bushes. 

A soul crusher. But only one who smiles. 

8. Let’s do extra names! Scottie Slam. Scheffler Slam. Scheff’s Kiss. 

Yeah, the season slam is in play. Scottie Very Hottie would be the fav on the PGA, the U.S. Open and the Open Championship. 

9. Do you wager the sector or Scheffler at any of these? Don’t giggle. 

10. Love the second on Sunday on the 18th, the place Scheffler waited for caddie Ted Scott, a key a part of the Scheffler narrative. Others appear to love it, too. It’ll be our most-read story this week. 

11. Love this from Scott afterward: “When I was 19 years old, a guy by the name of Ryan Smith told me, if you want to get better at something, find people who are better than you and spend time with them. That’s kind of been my motto in life.”

12. Love that Scheffler would have gone residence at any level this week had his first little one been born.

13. Love that Scheffler celebrated his win Sunday evening on the Inwood Tavern in Dallas. 

14. A Top Dawg waitress tells me Scheffler was on the bar a week in the past. Sat unbothered. Love that, too. 

15. Scheffler wants a rival. Shoot, we nonetheless whisper when Tiger and Phil get near getting paired collectively. It’s not a lot that we like a battle, it’s that we like a facet. Let’s run via this yr’s contenders. 

16. Max Homa, main participant is welcomed. He tied for third. 

17. Homa, on what he deliberate for Sunday evening: 

“I haven’t drank in a really, really, really long time, but I’ve been planning it for Sunday after the Masters, so probably not great. It’ll be all right.”

Same, brother. Same. 

18. Collin Morikawa has a sneaky good resume constructing at Augusta — a tie for forty fourth (2021), adopted by a fifth (2022), a tie for tenth (2023) and a tie for third. 

19. But a Sunday 74 was grisly. 

20. Tommy Fleetwood has to win a significant sooner or later, proper? He tied for third.

21. Xander Schauffele has to win a significant sooner or later, proper? He completed eighth. 

22. Patrick Cantlay has to win a significant sooner or later, proper? He tied for twenty second. 

23. Will Zalatoris has to win a significant sooner or later, proper? He tied for ninth. 

24. I really suppose that occurs this yr, on the U.S. Open. 

25. Scheffler wins the PGA.  

26. The Top Dawg is taking part in “The Night Owls” by Little River Band as I kind.

27. What occurred, Rory McIlroy? He’d taken a number of steps forward of the Masters. He tied for twenty second. 

28. Does McIlroy ever win a inexperienced jacket? Woods thinks he’ll. Jack Nicklaus, too. But I heard an fascinating thought on this (and I apologize that I can’t bear in mind from whom): But McIlroy could also be greatest served if he heard that he can’t win the Masters. I like that concept. 

29. What occurred, Justin Thomas? He missed the lower in most disastrous vogue. He appears not as misplaced as final yr, although. 

30. What occurred, Viktor Hovland? He missed the lower and missed a putt from perhaps 6 inches. He appears misplaced, only a quick six months or so when it appeared he’d discovered one thing particular. 

31. What occurred, Jordan Spieth? He appears a bit misplaced, although you’re proper to fret that he could keep on three majors. 

32. Please come again, Fred Couples. A golf nation wants your tweets. 

33. What occurred, Brooks Koepka? He tied for forty fifth. 

34. He wins the Open Championship. 

35. What occurred, Jon Rahm? He additionally tied for forty fifth.  

36. The Champions Dinner sounded nice, although. 

37. Time for a beer. First up is Good Googly Moogly by Tapped 33, a brand new brewery in Augusta. We like our good beers on this house, and this can be a nice one.   

38. Does Scheffler return to sliders for his dinner?

39. What occurred, Phil Mickelson? He tied for forty third. 

40. For so long as I write this reflection column, I’ll proceed to consider his 2021 PGA win will be the most weird factor we see … this decade? These 25 years? Ever? No one — nobody — noticed that coming.

41. Of course, a Woods win trumps it. 

42. What occurred Dustin Johnson? He tied for third — from the underside. 

43. I’ll by no means tire of Bryson DeChambeau’s sport tinkering. He tied for sixth. I believe he makes a run on the PGA. 

44. I’ll by no means tire of the DeCham-show. The lifting of the signal submit was meme’d to the moon. 

45. To be sincere, I walked previous one and had a considered choosing it up myself. Or considered making an attempt to.  

46. While NSFW, I watched this Patrick Reed clip a half-dozen occasions and laughed every time. 

47. So perhaps Golf Channel’s Brandel Chamblee has some extent. Scheffler is taking part in within the midst of an ideal storm — he’s at peak type, and the others aren’t. There’s potential for not simply extra Scheffler wins, however Scheffler blow-outs.   

48. But really, Nelly Korda is the very best participant on the planet. The Chevron is that this week. 

49. The RBC Heritage can also be this week. There must be a break. 

50. And right here’s a sizzling, sizzling, sizzling take:

Is it really a bit bit OK that … 

Golf is separated?

[Ducks.]

Here me out. We missed the very best on the planet coming collectively. If you’re a PGA Tour individual, you welcomed again Rahmbo, DeChambeau and Koepka again into your universe. If you’re a LIVer, identical thought, only for Rors, Spieth, Scheffler and the gang. But the purpose is, principally everybody couldn’t look ahead to it to occur. There was anticipation. The NFL has it. Baseball has it. They even have a good time it. 

So right here’s hoping that if there’s a coming collectively, there’s a clear-cut season. Not golf every single day of the week. 

51. I perceive this could make my job more durable. I’m positive you’re involved about that. 

52. The Top Dawg is taking part in “Tonight’s the Night (Gonna Be Alright)” by Rod Stewart as I kind.

53. I like Jason Day’s match. I wouldn’t put on the controversial vest; I’m not a giant words-on-shirts man. But I would put on one thing else from Malbon. I like that there are alternatives past one-color polos. I’m not alone, both. 

54. You made a mistake, Zach Johnson. I’m an skilled at swearing myself, and that, sir, wasn’t swearing at your self, which was the excuse he gave after video caught him really swearing at some jeers. Don’t lie. Don’t suppose individuals are fools. 

55. I gained’t quickly overlook the deluge of reports on Friday. Spieth’s quad. Brian Harman’s 47 on the second 9. Woods making the lower for a report time. DeChambeau and the signal. Tyrrell Hatton blasting sluggish play. Zach Johnson and the followers. Thomas’ meltdown. Hovland’s missed gimme. The wind. Wow. 

56. A number of of my favourite tales from the week! Michael Bamberger revisited final yr’s guidelines controversy that includes Koepka, and you may learn the story right here.  

57. Alan Bastable talked to one of many patrons who noticed final yr’s tree fall, and you may learn the story right here. 

58. Josh Berhow tried to seek out the maker of the Masters’ Crow Nest beer, and you may learn the story right here. 

59. Speaking of meals, James Colgan hung out with chef Jose Andres, the creator of Rahm’s Champions Dinner, and international savior. You can learn the story right here. 

60. Dylan Dethier summed all that performed out throughout Sunday’s ultimate spherical, and you may learn the story right here. 

61. Zephyr Melton’s stay function Bailey Shoemaker from the Augusta National Women’s Amateur is great, and you may read the story here. 

62. Claire Rogers chronicled a day along with her dad and his sister, and you may learn the story right here. 

63. Sean Zak described a Bryson DeChambeau week that began with the first-round lead, and what it might imply for the professional going ahead. You can learn the story right here.   

64. Ryan Barath went into the historical past books for a have a look at the golf equipment used on 10 of the Masters most well-known photographs, and you may learn the story right here.

65. Nick Dimengo described how the Par-3 Contest — sure, actually — may also help your sport, and you may learn the story right here.

66. Jack Hirsh wrote about former winners’ thoughts on how a 15-handicap would fare at ANGC, and you may learn the story right here. 

67. Jessica Marksbury detailed a recipe for a pimento cheese patty soften, and you may learn it right here. 

68. Josh Sens sat down with former champ Nick Faldo, and you may learn the story right here. 

69. Jonathan Wall had the phrase on the late-approved irons DeChambeau was taking part in, and you may learn the story right here. 

70. Here are a number of of my tales! And some thoughts. Matthieu Pavon tied for twelfth. His story is why we love sports activities, I kinda suppose. Tragedy, triumphs. Moms, sons. Buried cash at ultra-private nation golf equipment. You can learn it right here. 

71. Gary Player, Jack Nicklaus and Tom Watson hit their ceremonial tee photographs — however I adopted their golf balls. I’d been curious what occurred to them. Turns out, they had been guarded virtually as carefully because the nuclear codes. 

72. My Greg Norman walk-along. You may give it a learn right here. Some fast thoughts. He was dressed to play, together with his straw hat, white polo and black pants. He acquired each greetings — and double-takes. He was genuinely eager about watching golf. He appeared shy when people shouted to him. He opened up when he informed me he’d eaten a sandwich out of a inexperienced bag (how the sandwiches are wrapped on the Masters). He jabbed me within the arm. Unfortunately, as experiences swirl, I walked with him Friday, not Thursday, when he adopted McIlroy.  

73. Time for an additional beer. Next up is Tropicalia IPA from Creature Comforts Brewing Co., in Athens, Ga. 

74. Sandwich rankings! I had ‘em all. For science. First, a word on my tastes, to give you a sense of where I’m coming from. I’m easy. My dad was a meat cutter, so I’m very meat and potatoes. — and most of my meals appear to be they arrive off the Masters menu already. With that, we do have a brand new No. 1, gang, although solely as a result of I hadn’t had the Georgia peach ice cream sandwich in earlier visits. That was a mistake. Debbie Blount, who I’d as soon as written about right here, handled me to 1 on Thursday afternoon. The chunk of ice cream was good. The two sugar cookies it sat between had been good. Put collectively, it’s the brand new king. 

75. The breakfast sandwich. The sausage appeared not as greasy as earlier years, the biscuit not as crumbly.

76. The barbecue sandwich. The sauce tasted higher this yr. More chunk. It’s nonetheless too small, although. 

77. Pimento cheese. More chunk right here, too. 

78. Chicken biscuit. A very good-sized piece of rooster. Same biscuit because the breakfast sandwich. 

79. Club sandwich. Pretty common. 

80. Ham and cheese on rye. I don’t like rye bread. But not dangerous, not dangerous. 

81. Chicken sandwich. Slightly chewy, however I did just like the spice. 

82. Chicken salad. Lacking a bit taste.  

83. Egg salad. Same because the rooster salad sandy. Not a lot zip. 

84. Let’s see how the rankings look examine to final yr (I swear that is the primary time I’ve regarded since then, do you have to be curious):

No. 1: breakfast sandwich; No. 2: membership sandwich; No. 3: barbecue sandwich. No. 4: rooster sandwich; No. 5: pimento cheese; No. 6: sausage biscuit; No. 7: ham and cheese on rye; No. 8: rooster biscuit. No. 9: rooster salad; No. 10: egg salad. 

The takeaways? An increase of the rooster biscuit. Consistency with the detest of the salads. 

And my abdomen feels humorous.

85. The Top Dawg is taking part in “Cold as Ice” by Foreigner as I kind.  

86. The Monday eclipse looks like 75 years in the past. Here, it felt hazy, I suppose. Toward the height of it, I stood to the left of the first fairway and had bother making out gamers on the adjoining ninth.  

87. I requested a waitress on the Top Dawg what’s the craziest factor she’d seen in the course of the week — and she or he shared a narrative from a earlier yr. 

A bunch was paying the workers to slap them within the face. 

“You could slap them as hard as you wanted?” I requested. 

“We could slap them as hard as we wanted.” she stated. 

88. Overheard-among-the-patrons time! Up first, this one, on Monday afternoon:

Patron to volunteer sporting a inexperienced polo: “I see you wearing the green polos, but the green coats, who are they?”

Volunteer to patron: “They hit the lottery.”

89. There was this one, on Wednesday afternoon:

Patron one to patron two: “I wanna steal a piece of turf.”

Patron two to patron one: “Brah, I’ll help you.”

90. There was this one, additionally on Wednesday afternoon:

Male patron to feminine patron: “You look like you’re from New York.”

Female patron to male patron: “Miami.”

Male patron to feminine patron: “Oh.”

91. There was this one, on Thursday afternoon:

“Any other course we play now in the future will be trash.”

92. There was this one, on Sunday afternoon: 

Male patron to feminine patron: “So what does she do again?”

Female patron to male patron: “She’s a boudoir photographer.”

Male patron to feminine patron: “What’s that?”

Female patron to male patron: “Uh, a sexy photographer. Like if your wife wanted to give you a calendar with pictures of her in it.”  

93. Then there was Sarge. I wrote about him in our Seen and Heard publication, and I’ll share it right here, too. He’s price it.

Sarge? That’s what everybody calls Melvin Brown at Augusta, and we’ll confer with him as Melvin Brown simply this as soon as to respect that. Sarge is a cart driver for the Masters. Been doing it for 20-plus years at Augusta National. I’m blissful he’s. 

I’ve realized that over his 85 years, Sarge has lived some life. 

From the Augusta space, he served within the Army, he tells me. Lived in bases within the Midwest. The South. But he’d proven he was additionally an athlete, and he was quickly on all types of groups. 

Here, he has a pair tales. 

For a stretch, he performed basketball towards Wilt Chamberlain. At the time, the Hall of Famer was a member of the Harlem Globetrotters. Sarge, although, emphasizes he performed towards him. 

Not with. 

“He was good,” Sarge says. 

Did you rating?

“Oh yes.”

Nowadays, Sarge performs softball. He used to journey the nation for it. Now, his schedule is generally native, although subsequent weekend, he’s going to play in a event in South Carolina. “We’re going to play those old fogeys.” Sarge mans first. But he’s a hitter. 

How a lot so?

He admits he can’t actually run anymore. But so good is his stick, that they’ve modified the foundations only for him. 

He will get a runner only for him. He hits the doubles, triples and residential runs. Somebody else does the leg work. 

“They don’t want to lose me.”

(Sarge additionally stated an area tv station just lately profiled one in every of his groups. He informed me to look it up. I did. Have a glance here!)

94. Here’s Player’s response on the best way to overcome a foul shot: 

“Well, I consider to win majors or to win the massive tournaments that you just needed to love adversity since you’re going to withstand it. Doesn’t matter who you’re.

“And I simply felt that it’s not possible to play a spherical of golf with out hitting dangerous photographs, so it was really a part of the sport. I taught myself to virtually take pleasure in it, however loved it, perhaps in I don’t know what vogue, however it’s a part of the sport.

“Now, why will we observe all this quick sport to recuperate? And this leads me to say, you take heed to individuals right now discuss — the daddy talks about his son, or a coach: Well, you need to see this younger boy. He hits the ball 380 yards.

“You by no means hear him say how nice his quick sport is, how nice his thoughts is. Hitting the ball is an asset, however it’s not a necessity. But placing, if it’s a must to hit it that lengthy, it counts as a lot as a 400-yard drive.

“But the place are we going, you have a look at the Tour, in 30 years, plus, minus, they’ll all hit the ball 400 yards as a result of there’s such nice incentivization. They are going across the faculty gyms now doing weight coaching. Rory McIlroy confirmed me yesterday, he does a lifeless elevate, 400 kilos.

“So that is the place we’re going, and that is the place we’d like the R&A and the USGA and the PGA to get collectively correctly in making a choice a couple of golf ball as a result of golf is — nothing in regards to the sport right now, not one single factor, is identical as once we performed. Not one single factor.

“And so we’ve bought to chop the ball again 60 yards, 50 yards. Otherwise, the entire idea of the sport, the historical past of the sport, the par-5, par-4, par-3, that’s gone. There aren’t any extra par-5s. These younger guys are hitting 8-irons to par-5s.

“So we’re altering the entire historical past of the sport. Now, they’re two totally different video games, the R&A by no means agreed with me that they’re two totally different video games, skilled and novice. Go watch Jack Nicklaus in his prime or Tom [Watson] or Tiger. You’ll see how totally different it’s to the way in which you guys play.

“They have to chop that ball again, I don’t know what’s going to occur. They discuss making golf programs longer. The world is working out of water, significantly, and the prices of the machine, the mower, fertilizer, labor, why do this? It’s so easy, simply lower the ball again. Very, quite simple.

“And so I’m quite concerned about where the game of golf is going.”

That was some journey there. 

95. Random-things-seen-at-Augusta time! First up, I walked holes 10-18 late Wednesday afternoon, forward of the storm, and noticed a fleet of employees with buckets, going left and proper filling each divot. 

96. Also that evening, about 200 patrons had been stationed on the famed twelfth tee. There had been no golfers. There could be no golfers. Didn’t appear to matter. 

97. Also that evening, a employee was slicing the financial institution that surrounds the water on 12 with a lawnmower. I believe I watched that for about quarter-hour. Mesmerizing. Quite the exercise. 

98. Also that evening, I noticed a patron with a WWE title belt. 

99. Birds, or lack thereof, have been an Augusta story for some time — however I noticed an eagle on Wednesday afternoon. Soared proper above the massive leaderboard to the best of the first tee  

100. I’m satisfied nothing is extra environment friendly than the present store. It’s artwork. When I stood in line on Saturday, I began outdoors amongst about 500 individuals, then we needed to wait inside, then we needed to wait on the entrance, then we shopped — and I used to be executed in about 45 minutes or so. That stated, in case you suppose a few of the tee photographs trigger claustrophobia, strive muscling your technique to get a T-shirt. 

101. Below is proof I used to be there. That’s me, to the best of the girl within the pink visor. 

102. As a part of the Pavon story, I talked with teacher and analyst Mark Immelman on all that’s Augusta — and I believed I’d share that right here.

“When you go to Augusta National and the Masters, there is a regal sort of feel about everything. It’s like you’re getting to go into Buckingham Palace. And you mind your P’s and your Q’s because you would if you were dining with a king or a queen. And when you go there, you steal a glance at the artwork and the sculptures, and you have a reverence for the place. And I feel like that joy that you sense are people that are just in awe of what the golf course and the tournament represent. I mean, the care that is taken and no stone is left unturned by the Masters club. And they put on the very best event that is humanly possible. And there’s that exclusivity about it, too. So when I go there, I feel like it’s royalty. And I get, just for a little, to spend some time in a palace and I look upon these great kings and statesmen that have inhabited those walls in the past.” 

One bonus thought! Back to that approachable-face factor. 

Friday, after working my method again from my stroll with Norman, a pair requested the place the first gap was. I pointed them within the course — however informed them that I used to be strolling that method and so they might simply comply with me in the event that they like. They did. We talked. They had been from West Virginia. I informed them I used to be initially from Milwaukee. I informed them I’d been working for GOLF for about four-and-a-half years.

“Wow, that’s such a cool job.”

Yeah, yeah, it’s.

Thanks for studying.   

Editor’s observe: The writer wrote related tales from the 2023 and 2022 Masters, and they are often discovered right here and right here.