Inside the race to Phoenix Open’s 16th hole

SCOTTSDALE, Ariz. — Thousands of people fidgeted of their stall like frozen cattle, pressed up in opposition to iron fences. Pink glints of the solar had been peeking out over close by McDowell Mountain. It wasn’t simply the begin of a brand new day, it was the begin of Phoenix Open Saturday, the craziest day on the {golfing} calendar. 

Women in solar attire huddled collectively for heat in the feels-like 45 levels air. They had been allowed to make lavatory journeys, however solely one after the other. No buddy system. In every other occasion, these circumstances could be undesirable. But each one in all these followers needed to be there. Or not less than their pals had satisfied them correctly. 

Like many issues at the WM Phoenix Open, the half-mile dash ticket-holders make to the 16th hole is a convention that vegetation its toes firmly on the line between absurd and merely enjoyable. Police officers line the paved runway prematurely of collisions and accidents. It’s sure to occur. Sergeant Wes Shaffer served a reminder for the gents in pole place: 

“Take it easy, now. I don’t get paid to get run over. I get paid to move the fence.” 

But then a second later, a proud member of the Thunderbirds got here by with recommendation: “High knees. I wanna see some high knees boys. Good form.”

Those Thunderbirds — the native group that runs the occasion — are taking part in with home cash and so they understand it. They tossed inexperienced tee shirts into the crowd and delivered complimentary espresso to the first folks in line. Tournament officers throughout the PGA Tour season have proven up all week questioning how they’ll fire up an oz. of this rabid fanhood for his or her occasion.

“They all want the secret sauce,” one Thunderbird stated. 

That secret sauce was sufficient to ship a 16-person bachelor get together group to mattress after a pair seltzers Friday night time. They tucked themselves in round 9 p.m. and rose in time to be a part of the line round 2 a.m. They would have liked to do as most bachelor events do, however in the end they determined “we’re not that young.” 

Among their youthful counterparts was Orion Zakas and his crew, who confirmed up round 2:15 after attending a Lee Brice nation live performance Friday night time.

“We’re running on beer and Uncrustables,” Zakas stated.

Just behind him was an athlete from Grand Canyon University who had not too long ago fractured his AC Joint, however stood at the head of the line together with his sling and his smile. Behind them had been loads of others in full costume — the George Washington quartet, the pair of astronauts, even a masculine Snow White. 

The purpose is apparent: get to 16 as rapidly as doable. The route isn’t as apparent to first-timers — it’s only a fish-hook round event tents and a pond — neither is the begin time. The gates are opened solely as soon as there’s sufficient daylight developing over the horizon. On Friday morning, this dash is much less intense, but it surely will get the identical steady therapy. One of Friday’s sprinters had apparently consumed a bit an excessive amount of pre-race vodka and threw most of it again up as they reached the grandstand. 

News groups had been rolling on the motion for hours as these sorry souls waited and waited. When the pink gentle flicked on, one broadcaster shouted into his mic, “Welcome…to the running of the bros!” It’s not the largest praise however ‘the bros’ liked it. This is what they got here for. 

Tournament staffers ready themselves up the drive. A PGA Tour content material staffer flew a drone overhead, to which the heathens chanted Shoot it down, Shoot it down, Shoot it down! The remainder of the event was simply getting warmed up. Players hit balls on the dewy observe vary, making ready to re-start Friday’s second spherical. 

When native police cautiously started opening the gate, they demanded endurance. PGA Tour Live broadcaster Colin Swatton stepped in with mic in hand. Five, 4, three, two … Ryan Sandoval tapped on his telephone. He was the one speaking a giant recreation. It was only a half mile, with a downhill stretch in the center, and he figured he may do it in three minutes and thirty seconds. So he cued up the good tune: “Let’s Get it Started” by the Black Eyed Peas. Run-time: 3 minutes, 38 seconds, with ideally suited lyrics.

And the base retains runnin’, runnin’ and runnin’, runnin’ and runnin’ runnin’…

Sandoval ripped round the first flip so rapidly he practically took out a event staffer dragging a waste bin. But that’s the place he caught a break on the downhill He had one way or the other constructed a three- or four-second lead over a member of the bachelor get together.

“You’re way ahead,” I knowledgeable him from my perch above all of it. “I know!” He gasped, grabbing his hat to preserve it from slowing him down. 

The remainder of the horde adopted like a stampede, eight runners huge. The George Washingtons had gotten cut up up in the mayhem. Same for the bachelor get together. After the first 300 or so exerted their supreme health, it was clear that not everybody was in a race for first place. One sneaky man slugged from a Coors Light can as he jogged by. Another tried a shortcut round the concessions truck however didn’t veer rapidly sufficient again onto the route. He smashed right into a metallic dumpster, knocked a rubbish bin into the path and popped again up to rejoin the chase. Those behind him leapt over the particles. There was no time to…waste. 

The prize was delightfully completely different this yr, too. A 90-minute frost delay Thursday morning pushed again the event’s first two rounds in order that professionals truly arrived on 16 hours sooner than regular. So these animals had been technically in pursuit of a golfy morning, too. There are solely so many seats on 16, and it’s first-come, first-served. 

Sandoval lived up to his guarantees, weaving round the seventeenth tee and up to the stadium’s entrance. He could have beat everybody else however he didn’t beat the Black Eyed Peas. The previous couple of Runnin’ runnin’s from will.i.am performed out simply earlier than he completed. Unofficial time: 3:43. By the time Zakas and crew caught up, they shared the prize of third-row seats and pure elation. About a half hour later, the professional golfers arrived, together with some thirsty chanting.

Serve us beer! Serve us beer! Serve us beer!